I love to read. Lots of weird stuff on my bookshelf (well, now electronic bookshelf). One such book is Heart of Darkness, by Joseph Conrad. Have you read it? If not, you can buy it here for like $1. Its a story of a man's journey up the Congo and the mysteries and psychological issues he faces from that experience.
None of that really has anything to do with this post other than I love the title and the book and would recommend, especially if you like classic fiction.
Back on point - I am feeling the darkness in my heart right now. Having a hard time quantitifying or qualifying what the issue is, although my guess is that I have too many options. I feel like my life is like a trip to Woodmans - too many things to choose from, most of which seem like ok choices with a few really bad choices snuck in for good measure.
I have been aimlessly wandering around the grocery store that is my brain and feeling dissatisfied. Is THIS really what I am meant to be/do/want? Am I expecting too much from my life? Should I surrender and accept that this is how things are going to be and that it is ENOUGH?
Enough is a pretty loaded word dontcha think? Not bad, not insufficient, just... lacking. There it is. Happy freaking Monday.
Hoping that you see some light peeking through the dark & twisty today. Love you!
ReplyDeletethat is a great book-- it is.
ReplyDeleteand you, my dear-- i love your honesty.
ALWAYS.
and life being like a trip to woodmans.
ohhhhhhhhhh yes. I HEAR THIS.
i hear you.
and i love you.
xoxoxo.
So, you already know that I am with you, and I get it. And I'm on your side no matter what you choose.
ReplyDeleteAnd here's what I've decided from my watching of the West Wing on Netflix of late: before I die I want to be able to say, "I serve at the pleasure of the president." So, if you could go ahead and become the president of *something* and then hire me, that would be great :)
I think I feel this way once a month. I look around and think..I love this life, but sometimes I wish parts of it were just DIFFERENT. I guess different isn't always better, but it's hard to not dream about it sometimes!!
ReplyDelete