Turkey Day Redux

Do you have those little traditions that, because of their importance in your mind, sort of take on a life of its own?  Man,  Love me some traditions.  The problem with that, is sometimes the reality doesn't live up to the memory - rose colored glasses looking at the past. 

Thanksgiving is a BIG tradition for my family.  For many years, it is the one holiday we do not travel for, no obligation to do the big family dinner back home.  We have had our nice little Friends-giving for a long time.  Before Luke, Dottie, and Charlie.  It was always the Angie and Barb Thanksgiving show. 

Some years, our participants were more appreciative of the efforts than others.  There may have been a year where the house almost started on fire, where the ginger beer did not cure morning/all day sickness, where someone (who sucks and whose name will not be mentioned here) had his fresh kill in my driveway.  There were pingpong tournaments, naps, teaching the kids to rabidly hate the Detroit Lions. 

It was always the Angie and Barb Thanksgiving show.  If you want to see some recaps - Barb has been much more diligent of keeping our memories - check it out here. 

This year, because there has been a huge readjustment in our lives, I was a little worried that the actual event could not live up to the mythical place it held in my heart.  We had pinterest boards of ideas, multiple menu discussing emails, serious phone discussions.  Could it really be as great as in my mind? 

Then, 10 days before Thanksgiving, my knee gave out on me.  I couldn't walk.  Couldn't stand.  Was scheduled for unexpected surgery. 

I may have sent an angst filled email to Barb saying _ I cannot do this. 

Luke making Turkey decor (a must have).

But we did.  And it was, again, the Angie and Barb Thanksgiving Show.  Barb has a beautiful post with lots of pictures of the food. So I won't rehash.  I just want to share a few of my favorite pictures.   

I may have a new found love for Bourbon.  Yum.

Snow White (Dottie) making my family recipe for cranberry relish. 

Turkey Relish Tray, made with love by Barb and Dottie

I am a little bummed that there is not one picture of me and Barb.  In all our preparatory glory.  The food was wonderful, the house if not super clean, was presentable, the guests were fantastic and wonderful company, the drinks were plentiful and the day was just as wonderful in my heart and mind as in reality. 

We have a no Christmas till after the Turkey is put away rule in our house.  So Thanksgiving night, Mike the superdad, took Luke and Dottie out to work on the Christmas lights.  Charlie wanted in on the action too. 

We will plan on for 2013 - no lumpy gravy next time.  I promise. 

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes...Ventage Tuesday

I know that I have been a Debbie Downer lately.  But too bad.  Life is hard sometimes.  But life is really damn good too.  I have all my needs.  I have the time and ability to have wants.  We are on a Cinderella kick here in our little corner of paradise.  I have always thought A Dream is a Wish your Heart Makes was the ultimate princess song.  But as a momma, when I sleep?  I don't dream, I am too dang tired.  I dream when surfing the inter webs... 

So in the fine Ventage Tuesday tradition, here is my list of the week.  A wish list.  Some are bigger dreams than others, but I am actually very easy to please.  

I really love Wonder Woman.  Always been a superhero kind of girl instead of a Princess kind of girl.  

I love this print. 

This Cloud 9 necklace.  Reminder that happiness is right there for the taking.  

This print just makes me happy.  

If we are dreaming big - I would love this gorgeous (and outrageously expensive) orange stove/oven

In the land of the frozen tundra, I think this snow gauge would be an excellent addition to our front yard

Been drooling over these Le Creuset French ovens for years.  In Flame please.  

I am a Star Wars geek.  When I was little I used to demand that my mom do the Princess Leia buns in my hair.  I could really rock that look.  I would only like this gift from Mike, but these rings say it as only Han Solo and Leia could.  

I like the design and sentiment of this House Rules decal.  

I think it would look great in our basement.  

As you know, I love me some make up.  Would love this Urban Decay Vice Eyeshadow palette 

Most of all, right now, I would like Mary Poppins.  To be my coach, friend and nanny.  

I am sure that Em, Katrina, Barb, and Steph will have some pretty great lists... since one of us will hopefully win the Powerball on Wednesday night, maybe we can make these wishes come true?  Happy wishing girls!

Grateful

There is a giant mess in my kitchen and refrigerator just waiting to be cooked, prepped, sorted, poured and served.  I am grateful for the abundance and not wondering where our next meal is coming from.  

My best friend lives too far away.  I am grateful she is in my basement sleeping so she will be rested to help me serve our years favorite feast in a year where a lot has changed.  

My children had the following in the last 10 hours - trouble falling asleep, coughing so hard it woke him up, peeing the bed and the drama of finding pi's in the dark, and a five am wakeup time.  I'm grateful they are healthy and independent and secure in our home and family.  I am also grateful to have this special quiet time with them before the Thanksgiving madness today.  

My husband is tired, irritable and a little overextended right now.  He works so hard and does very little for himself.  I am grateful that he still wants to hold my hand.  That he finds humor in just about everything and that at the end of the day, he is my true partner.  I could not do this without him.  

So many imperfections make up this perfect life.  I hope your day is filled with friends and family and if there is grief or trouble in your heart, I pray for your comfort.  

Gobble gobble up that gratitude.  

Deep Breath

Ever have those weeks/months when you can't catch your breath?  

I am there.  Since I was last here, I have had knee surgery, a serious daycare issue and some other things that make me feel like I am barely treading water.  

I need to find some peace.  I need to be a stronger advocate/coach.  I need to learn to put my stress away and get over the hump.  

I do not know how to do that.  

We are seriously considering some big changes.  

• Maybe hiring a nanny to come into our home.  
• Maybe one of us making some significant work changes. 
• Maybe a mental breakdown.  

Ok, so the last one is not such a great idea.  Right now, none of these seem like good ideas - just potential new problems.  

But I must breathe.  

Tell Me a Little About Yourself

So in case you haven't noticed, us Ventage gals are list makers.  In fact, I have known Barb to make lists of lists she needs to make.  There are lots of quirky little things about everyone. That is the inspiration for today's prompt - five fun facts that people might not know about you. 

Here goes (in no particular order):

1.  I am very particular about my sleeping arrangement.  I don't mean who I am sleeping with - although I am pretty particular about that too - I mean, the logistics.  I do not like the room to be hot.  In fall/winter I believe the optimal temperature to be 63 degrees.  I do not like my feet covered - at all.  It makes me feel like I am in a coffin.  I only want one warm blanket.  

This creates some interesting marital challenges.  Mike believes the room is too cold, we should have more blankets and that i am a weirdo.  I make him live with the cold temp, put on a sweatshirt and extra blankets (only on his side).  

2.  I do not like to listen to the radio if there are other people in the car.  I will ALWAYS turn off the radio when I have car mates. I think my ears cannot multitask.  I would prefer conversation.  

I do let the kids listen to music in the car, mostly because it prevents them from picking at each other which is much worse than my multitasking ears.  

3.  I am a freak about real mail.  I send lots and lots and lots of real mail.  I love to get letters and postcards.  I obsess about invitations and Christmas cards and little surprise mail treats to people.  

if you have never gotten real mail from me, it is probably because I don't have your address.  if you would like a mail surprise, email me your info!

4.  I love to play bingo.  I am an old lady at heart and LOVE the bingo.  I even had a bingo themed birthday party one year!

I am hoping I can convince Barb to play bingo one night when she is here for Thanksgiving.

5.  My name is Angie and I have a denim addiction.  You might remember this Ventage post where I went on and on about having the perfect jeans.  Well, my friends, I take jeans very seriously.  I own like 85 pairs.  No joke.  I have so many jeans that I have several totes in the basement of jeans.  I have about 30 pairs in regular rotation.  I continue to buy jeans when I find them and like them.  It is a sickness.  

Lets not mention all these jeans to Mike, ok?  he might not think that is such a great idea.

There you have it.  The (select few I am willing to share) things that make me me. :)  

Check out the inner workings of Katrina,  Em,  Steph and Barb to see what makes their clocks tick too.  And share something random about yourself, please!

hello monday....

hello to x rays.  I hurt my knee yesterday and have been immobilized.  I can't bear any weight and cannot extend my leg straight.  It hurts.  badly.  

hello to a sweet boy.  This morning after Mike helped move me to the couch, Luke carried over some pillows and asked if I wanted a blanket and kiss.  yes please.

hello to new bedtime drama.  Dorothy has always been my easy to bed child.  All of a sudden she is fighting bedtime and it is a battle I don't quite have the stamina for.  

hello to a lifesaver.  Steph offered to come help me tomorrow in my crutch wielding state since Mike has to go out of town for work.  So lucky to have her near me!  

hello to Thanksgiving preparations.  More on this to follow.  It is so grand it deserves its own post.  

hello to the white stuff.  today the flakes were flying, not sure if I am ready for this!


hello Monday is inspired by Katrina!

Face the Facts Friday

I have never been so ill prepared for any job as I am for being a mom. 

I hate being unprepared. 

This boy is my 4 and 1/2 years of  joy and challenge. 

Luke has a pretty significant speech delay.  He (and we!) have been receiving speech therapy since he was two.  He is making GREAT strides but still has a long way to go.  He works so hard.  He is my Warrior. 

The thing about being a Warrior, though?  It has some down sides.  That tenacity, the intensity the strength - is coupled with anxiety, fear of failing and anger. 

Dude.  Anger and anxiety effing suck.  Especially for a four year old and his parents. 



Luke goes to an awesome day care.  They have our philosphy about physical activity (great!), large and fine motor skill development (fantastic!) and most of all patience (much needed).  These women work their butt off every day for my kids (and other lucky Green Bay parents/kids) and they have so much love and grace.  I am humbled by the challenges of their job. 

One challenge?  My Warrior.  He is tender hearted, bullish, agressive and emotional.  He struggles to communicate his needs/wants/feelings.  Recently "I am feewling vewy fwustwated" is a common refrain.  He has also been acting out pretty agressively - throwing chairs, threatening to hit the teachers, running away from the group.  This is exacerbated by hard transitions (new kids in/out of the classroom, substitute teachers, etc) and sleep challenges, speech challenges and always being the big kid. 

Yesterday was a hard day for my Warrior.  I picked him up and the first thing he said was, "I made bad choices".

This mom?  Wanted to lock herself in her car and cry.  How can he feel so bad and how can I make it better?  How can I help him channel his emotions and intensity in an ok way?  ARGH? 

I spent some time talking with Luke and his wonderful teacher Miss Meagan.  We agreed that the hardest time of day for him was right after lunch when things started to settle down for quiet/nap time.  We are going to have a call where he can check in with me and get a little momma love.  I hope its enough. 

Last night after dinner, I asked Mike to give Dottie and Charlie a bath.  Luke and I needed to take a walk and get outside.  My sweet Luke talked from the second we left the driveway until 45 minutes later when we returned.  He kept saying.  "I wuv you"  "I wuv when its just you and me"

Heartbreak.  I love having a lot of kids.  I even (most days) love having them close together.  But I usually only look at the good, the bad, they ugly of it - for me.  I forget that it can be hard to be the big brother of our chaotic brood.  That he needs just me or just Mike sometimes. 

Heartbreak #2 - I am not sure how to make that happen frequently enough.

Heartbreak #3 - Frequently enough for all. three. of. them. 

We had such a good walk/talk.  This kid is a gem - he is smart and funny and really really loving. 

I have no idea how I deserve him. 

I found the pictures on my iPhone.  I don't know exactly when he took them, or what he was up to.  But I lvoe the discovery and twinkle in his eye. 

And I need to find a way to maximize twinkle and skills to deal with the not so twinkly stuff.  For both of us. 

Beyond the Rhetoric

I hate when a long week feels like a LONG week.  Mike and I have a history of campaign work, elections, all that jazz and there is never an election week that isn't long. 

I hate it when my guy loses.  I mean, that really sucks. 

I hate reading all the crap on facebook - good or bad - post election.  Its done.  Today is a new day. 

But, I was inspired to tell you a few things.  I still love you if you disagree with me.  I believe you want the best for your family and future.  I know you love America and believe in good things. 

I hope you also know the following -

This is what a republican woman looks like.  No monocle.  No top hat.  No Scrooge McDuck money pit to swim in.  I do have a Mr Burns laugh, but only because I think it is funny, not because I am a bazillionaire.  I am a first generation college graduate from a working class neighborhood. 

I am pro-life.  I am pro-gun.  I am pro-gay marriage (because I am pro family and believe that adults that come together to raise children and create stable families, neighborhoods and communities are what is the most awesome thing about this country).  I believe in fairness and equality in opportunity.  I believe in public and private schools.  I believe in creating opportunities for success.  I am against pollution.  I am a religious believer and hold that very close to my heart. 

I am afraid of government.  I believe concentrating power in centralized government is bad for families and communities.  I believe there is evil in the world - real evil  -not fake republicans are eeeevilll or democrats are the deviiiiiill type evil. 

I will pray for President Obama and the success of this great country.  Congratulations to those of you who believe in his message, I know that victory can feel good and that you want good things to come of his leadership. 

Just remember that most of us that are on the "other side" have good intentions too.  We do not think you are bad.  That does not mean we have to agree. 

We all went to vote together on Tuesday morning.  In line, Luke announced that we were going to vote for Notre Dame.  Yesterday, I told him that Barak Obama was the winner.  He looked at me and asked if he had orange hair.  I said, no, President Obama has brown hair, just like Mommy.  Why would he have orange hair? 

"Mommy, the Broncos have orange hair."

I guess our little discussion about voting was a little unclear.  :)  He then asked if Notre Dame won.  I said, yes.  No reason for our whole house to be bummed yesterday. 

***A note.  This will probably be my only political post ever.  I truly respect your opinions even when they are different than mine and try to address issues with grace. 

Name that Tune!

Right now, a lot of the Ventage girls are in a music mode.  Well, I guess Em is always in a music mode, she is a music teacher.  Me?  Not so much right now. 

I HATE listening to music when I am in the car alone, mostly because the radio at 530 in the morning and 4 in the afternoon is mostly ads and I prefer the "company" of talk radio, some days it is the only adult conversation I get!  

But, the kids love music and have some favorites.  So here are the top five songs being played at my house right now in no particular order:

1.  Part of Your World - the Little Mermaid.  We have recently returned from Disney and Dorothy is all about the Princesses.  Ariel in particular.  We watch this on YouTube and have on repeat on the iPod ALL. THE. DAMN. TIME.  

2.  Everybody Talks - the Neon Trees.  Thank you Katrina for introducing this to me.  Luke LOVES this song and it is his song of choice for a dance party  

3. Just a Friend - Biz Markee.  I know, weird choice.  This song is my ringtone for when Mike calls.  OH BABEEE YOUUUUUU GOT WHAT I NEED.  (makes me laugh every time).

4.  Springsteen - Eric Church.  Probably the only somewhat current song I listen to on a regular basis.  

5.  Good Hearted Woman - Waylon Jennings and Willie Nelson.  This is my favorite song ever.  I love classic country music and especially love these two outlaws. 

Now you all know how tragically unhip and unmusicified my life is.  :)

Makeup Monday

The lovely Miss Josie did a post last week about some beauty must haves.  Very inspired and I love many of her picks.  

My confession?  I am a makeup junkie.  Like embarrassing hoarder junkie.  I have more eyeliners than most people have forks/knives/spoons.  It is a sickness.  

But what a beautiful sickness it is.  

I thought I would share some of my current favorites and help you spend some makeup moola before the holidays. 

My most recent purchase is The Balm Balm Jovi.  Besides being incredibly well packaged and clever, it is a great value.  Twelve versatile eyeshadows, a highlighter,a blush and two cheek/lip creams all for less than $40.  If you are looking for a good value and great colors, try this out.  I plan on putting Metal-ica and Iron Maid-in to good use. 

My next recommendation is the Urban Decay Ocho Loco eyeliner set.  Eight full size eyeliners and a sharpner for about $60.  Now, sold separately, an UD eyeliner sells for about $19/pencil so this is a HUGE value.  This is my go to eyeliner, goes on smooth, good blending and great color payoff. 

Lately I have been wearing Perversion (black black) but it took some practice to get it right because the color is really strong.  It creates a super dramatic look though and is a nice contrast to my daily "working mom makeup" when I want something more fun. 

Have you found any holiday must haves?

First on the First (of November)

My FIRST instinct was to wake him up when my alarm went off at 4:30 and he could still lie in bed.

My FIRST task was to make a large pot of contraband coffee when I got to the office. 

My FIRST thought was to hang up so I wouldn't lash out. 

My FIRST tears of the month came sitting at my desk, hoping no one would notice.  

My FIRST time of allowing myself to feel what a very important persons absence means in my day to day.  

My FIRST dance party of November happened in my kitchen.  

My FIRST bribe?  Chocolate milk.  

My FIRST guilt - knowing how much I have to be grateful for and so damn angry for being a wallower about the rest.